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Danica Patrick Shows Off Her Rocket Launchers, WNBA Teammates Have A Bikini-Off & Trump Loses His Patience

First Hump Day of April? An APRIL FOOLS Hump Day? I mean, are we in for a wild little ride today, or what? I think this is going to be a special class. How could it not be? Trump's set to address the nation tonight, we're sending astronauts to the MOON again in a few hours, and CB Bucknor continues to be just the worst umpire in the history of umpiring. In the post-Angel Hernandez era, of course. Nothing will ever match Angel. But CB's certainly trying. Anyway, welcome to a Hump Day Nightcaps – the one where Danica Patrick shows off the arms and throws back some wine to celebrate Florence Wine & Food Weekend. Good luck saying ANYTHING bad to Danica with these bazookas, libs. You won't stand a chance. What else? I've got the WNBA girls soaking up the last bit of the offseason, ESPN's Alyssa Lang hitting the beach, Trump obliterating a reporter, and, of course, CB! My man made a call that was so utterly bad last night that both teams just started laughing from their respective dugouts. Amazing. Grab you some of Danica's wine and be sure the bottle doesn't explode, and THEN settle in for a Hump Day 'Cap!I've got 14 meetings today and I'm alone with the kids, so there will be no beating around the bush in this class. All gas, no brakes. Try to keep up!For those who weren't locked into the big Rays-Brewers game last night, CB Bucknor, who is the worst umpire in the game at the moment, had another all-timer. And by all-time, I mean he should probably be sent to the moon later today with the astronauts. Coming off a brutal weekend in which he was publicly humiliated by both the Red Sox and Reds, CB made just a baffling call at first base last night. And I mean BAFFLING. It was so egregious, both teams literally just started laughing from their dugouts. Do you know how bad you have to be to get mocked by BOTH clubs? Rollllllll tape!Goodness gracious. I mean, credit to CB Bucknor for having the nuts to make that call. We all thought we'd seen the last of a dying breed when Angel Hernandez "retired," but buddy, we had no IDEA that CB Bucknor was waiting in the wings. How do you miss that? Seriously, how do you miss him stepping on first base? Well, for starters, you don't even look at the bag. That's a great place to start! WHY did CB Bucknor take his eyes off the bag? That's literally his job. His one and only job in that situation is to look at the bag and see A) if he touches it, B) when he touches it, and C) who gets there first. Instead, CB just randomly follows the poorly thrown ball, and then calls him OUT based on … nothing. Just literally guessed. I'm not sure I've ever seen a player miss first base. I played baseball for 20 years. I've watched it for 30. I can't recall a time when a runner missed first base. Second base? Sure. Third base? Once in a while. But FIRST base? Nope. Players usually get that one every time. Amazing. CB wasn't the only one who looked absolutely lost yesterday:Just a Hall of Fame moment here from Trump, who has taken a lot of heat over the past month or so. For those who thought the stress would knock the fastball down a few notches … think again. It's still very much there. It still very much plays. Reporter: "Iran threatened US companies."Trump: "With WHAT? BB guns?"Incredible. What a response. Even more incredible was the question itself. It's a fine question … if it had ANY credibility behind it. Like, any. But don't come into the Oval Office and ask the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES a question that you literally have no basis for. That's Big J 101. Years ago, when I was a freshman in college, my dad called me up randomly one night after Thanksgiving Break. He and my mom both, actually. I knew when I answered and they were both on the line, I was in trouble. Never a good sign. "Were you at the house at 3 a.m. last week with a girl?""No," I said, emphatically. Easy call, right? Couldn't have said it fast enough. No hesitation. "Now," he responded, "let me ask you again, and this time just know that I already know the answer. Were you at the house last week at 3 a.m. with a girl?"I was toast. He got me. He had me dead to rights. I WAS at the house with a girl! He knew it, because we had to reset the alarm when we left, and that all gets logged. The moral of that story? Don't ever ask a question that you already don't kinda-sorta know the answer to. At the very least, have some basic knowledge about the subject before asking it. Or answering it. OK, let's rapid-fire this quick class into a quick night of humping! I've got a rocket launch to watch, you know. First up? WNBA players report in 18 days, folks. Time is TICKING on any last-minute vacation time!Indiana Fever teammates Lexi Hull and Sophie Cunningham with a couple absolute HEATERS from the coast. This is what it's all about, boys and girls. I'm glad the WNBA season is a GO, but I'm sad to see the R&R come to an end. Speaking of R&R, let's check in with ESPN college football reporter, Alyssa Lang!Welcome to class, Alyssa! Good to see you enjoying some time off during college football's quiet time, although how quiet is it, really? Last I checked, spring practices were in full swing. Just ask Lane … and his former QB!Looks like both guys are settling in well to the #NewWorld order of the SEC. Lane's at LSU – where he still looks weird with that backdrop – and Trinidad is back at Ole Miss after a court battle, and refusing to say Lane's actual name. 171 days until Sept. 19, by the way. That's when LSU travels to Ole Miss. Just in case y'all were curious. OK, that's it for today. Excellent Hump Day. Great way to start April. Let's all have a glass of wine and enjoy this rocket launch with Danica Patrick!OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).Your dad ever remind you how dumb and naive you were back in the day? Email me at [email protected]. 

Read moreDanica Patrick Shows Off Her Rocket Launchers, WNBA Teammates Have A Bikini-Off & Trump Loses His Patience

This High School Baseball Score Is So Bad It Feels Illegal, AI-Generated Summary Is Hysterical

High school baseball is unique in the fact that the product on the field is either entertaining or one of the worst viewing experiences a human can endure. There is no in between, and when it comes to North Hall's midweek visit to Johnson in Gainesville, Georgia, we had an absolutely putrid scene unfold.North Hall, also located in Gainesville, carried a 15-6 record into its AAA regional contest against Johnson on Tuesday. The Knights of Johnson, however, could very well be the worst high school baseball team in the United States of America. Not only have the Knights not won a game in 2026, but they also entered the game having scored just four runs in their 17 games on the season. We're not trying to make fun of the school or the players here; we're simply presenting facts.Needless to say, the North Hall Trojans got the best of Johnson on Tuesday, and didn't exactly opt to take it easy on the struggling Knights.North Hall won the baseball game by a final count of 46-0. That is not a typo. The final score of a high school baseball game between two teams in the same region was 46-0.North Hall's Jake Beard had a truly absurd stat line, finishing 7 for 7 with a pair of doubles, a pair of home runs, including a grand slam, and 11 RBI. That's a good day at the office; imagine that kid walking down the halls of school the next day.The game was ultimately called because of a mercy rule, so we're not even talking about a full nine-inning game, and North Hall still hung 46 runs up. The Gainesville Times reported that the game was the first of a doubleheader, but no record of a second game was added to MaxPreps, which actually has North Hall and Johnson scheduled to play again on April 2 and April 3. Yikes.On the topic of MaxPreps, the well-known high school sports site has jumped into the AI-generated recap game, and it spit out a doozy about the 46-0 game."Winning is always nice, but doing so behind a season-high score is even better (just ask North Hall). Their pitchers stepped up to hand the Johnson Knights a 46-0 shutout on Tuesday. Considering the Trojans have won 14 contests by more than five runs this season, Tuesday's blowout was nothing new," the recap read.Right, nothing new or notable at all about a 46-0 scoreline.

Read moreThis High School Baseball Score Is So Bad It Feels Illegal, AI-Generated Summary Is Hysterical

Italy Has Turned Into The Biggest Joke In International Soccer

Italian soccer is down tremendously. You could quite easily make the case that Italy is on the most-embarrassing run in modern sports history following its loss to Bosnia and Herzegovina on Tuesday, which made it the first former World Cup champions to miss out on three straight World Cups.Whether you're a mega-casual soccer fan or someone who follows the sport incredibly closely, Italy is inevitably one of the first countries you think of when it comes to the sport, given the simple, general history of the game. Italy won its first two World Cups in the 1930s, its third in 1982, and hoisted the iconic trophy in 2006. Brazil is the only country to win the World Cup more than four times, having won it five times since 1958.The only hold-up in declaring Italian soccer completely dead at this point is Euro 2020. Winning the Euros isn't exactly comparable to winning the World Cup, but with Italy's victory over England in the 2020 final, it can't just be tossed in the trash.But missing out on not one, but three consecutive World Cups, is inexplicable, and for Italy to make disgusting history in a loss to Bosnia and Herzegovina is poetic.There are literally more words in the country's name (three) than World Cup appearances they have to their name (2). Granted, Bosnia and Herzegovina wasn't formally founded as a country until 1992, but that fact may actually make things more embarrassing for Italy.Bosnia punched its ticket to what will be its second World Cup appearance via a penalty shootout victory over Italy. The Italians jumped out to a 1-0 lead early, but things got grim in a hurry when defender Alessandro Bastoni was sent off with a direct red card before halftime.Bosnia snagged an equalizer in the 79th minute, held onto that scoreline through extra time, and had the luck of the draw in the shootout.Yes, it's ridiculous we're punching a ticket to the biggest sporting event on the planet via penalty kicks, but thems the rules, and Italy missed out. Again.

Read moreItaly Has Turned Into The Biggest Joke In International Soccer

Book Reveals How Close Yankees Were To Moving Out Of Bronx, George Steinbrenner Losing Ownership Bid

George Steinbrenner, for better or worse, stepped in as the face of the New York Yankees franchise when he led a group with E. Michael Burke and others to buy the franchise from CBS in 1973. It would be the launching pad to return the Yankees to relevancy in the years to come.However, Mike Vaccaro wrote in his new book, "The Bosses of the Bronx," that the Steinbrenner group wasn’t thought to have been the favorite to buy the team. Vaccaro wrote that a Lehman Brothers-led contingent with former New York Giants catcher Herman Franks set to run the team.Franks had already been courting Willie Mays as the team’s potential manager, according to Vaccaro. Mays would have been the first African American manager if the deal had been made. He would have been a season ahead of Frank Robinson, who made his debut in the role on Oct. 3, 1974.There were also rumblings, according to Vaccaro, about the team possibly being courted to a new stadium in New Jersey that would have had a fresh look compared to the crumbling Yankee Stadium that was hoping for city funding to make integral repairs.Stunningly enough, the Steinbrenner group bought the Yankees for just over $10 million when the Lehman Brothers’ group reportedly offered between $13.5 million and $14 million. It was the last time a baseball team was ever sold at a loss."This is the best buy in sports today. I think it’s a bargain," Steinbrenner said at his introductory press conference, Vaccaro’s book recalled.Steinbrenner made clear that the Yankees would stay in New York and not be swayed with a shiny new stadium in the Meadowlands where the NFL’s New York Giants and New York Jets would go on to play. Vaccaro wrote that Lehman Brothers "absolutely committed" to leaving the Bronx for Jersey, which turned out to be a "deal-breaker" for CBS.The net purchase for the Yankees ended up being about $8.8 million as the deal included two parking garages that CBS bought back for $1.2 million after the deal was closed.From 1973 until Steinbrenner’s death in July 2010, the Yankees won seven World Series titles.The Yankees are valued at approximately $9 billion today.

Read moreBook Reveals How Close Yankees Were To Moving Out Of Bronx, George Steinbrenner Losing Ownership Bid

NFL Has Gone To War With Referees Union And It Just Armed Itself For The Fight By Changing The Rules

PHOENIX — It seemingly did not bode well for the NFL when the state of its current contract negotiation with the NFL Referees Association had the league considering replacement officials that would come from the college ranks, including Division I, Division II and even Division III.What could go wrong?The league might have to consider officials that normally work games involving Mount Union, or Endicott or Wartburg to work the NFL regular season. Yes, a seemingly dire circumstance that might cause the league to cave and strike a deal with the referees to avoid a walkout. But then the NFL did things late Tuesday meant to reclaim power to encourage officials to accept a deal or be ready to move on without them.The NFL simply changed a couple of rules.It was if I was watching The Empire Strikes Back."Listen, the negotiations haven't progressed the way we hoped from a timing standpoint," NFL commissioner Roger Goodell admitted. "We obviously have obligations to our fans to have everybody in the National Football League play. And we will be prepared to play."So we're taking appropriate steps to be ready. But we're also keenly focused on negotiations, so we'd like to get a negotiated deal, and we certainly are focused on that." The NFL, in multiple votes that required three-fourths approval from owners – meaning a minimum of 24 owners – added two playing rules that prepare the league to help replacement officials in the eventuality of not having its regular officials.The league in 2026 is allowing officials at its Art McNally GameDay Central, the NFL's officiating command in New York, to consult with on-field officials when considering disqualifications for both flagrant football acts and non-football acts without those ever being called on the field.So if the officiating crew misses a player spitting on another player, as happened in the first game of the 2025 season with Jalen Carter, officials in New York can intervene. They can throw a flag and disqualify the offending player.And this: The NFL instituted rule No. 5 aimed directly at addressing bad calls from replacement officials by allowing the NFL officiating department in New York to correct "clear and obvious mistakes" by on-field officials that impact the game, "in the event there is a work stoppage involving the game officials represented by the NFL Referees Association."This new rule applies only in 2026, so it guards the NFL against a regular official walkout by mitigating against embarrassments by replacement officials. The rule also becomes moot if the regular zebras sign a new contract and report for work.Pretty smart."The thing I would say about playing proposal No. 5 is the things we put in there, we put in there because some of the officials we would have on the field would not be accustomed to making those calls," NFL Competition Committee Co-Chair Rich McKay said. "They don't have illegal contact in college football. It's a big part of our game. It impacts the passing game dramatically. And when we don't call it, we tend to see the passing yards in a game go down."We don't want to discourage someone who is not accustomed to it from calling it, but we want a chance to make sure they got it right."All of this is a result of a negotiation in which NFL sources say the regular refs want a 10 percent pay increase, want to protect a dead period during which they cannot be contacted by the league from the end of the season until May 16, do not wish to tie salaries to performance, and want playoff crews comprised on the basis of tenure while the NFL wants them comprised on the basis of highest performers during the season. "There is frustration discussed among the ownership about the state of negotiations with our officials," NFL executive vice president Jeff Miller said. "The effort has been pretty straightforward. I think we've been crystal clear, this is an opportunity for us to improve the state of our officiating. There needs to be accountability measures. There need to be performance measures. And that's what our negotiating posture has been."The owners were consistent in saying, ‘We’re more than happy to pay for performance.' This was consistent throughout the course of discussions the last couple of days. What they're insistent upon – insistent upon – is that the performance of the officials and accountability for the performance has to improve."And that's where we are in this negotiation and that's exactly where we're going to stay."

Read moreNFL Has Gone To War With Referees Union And It Just Armed Itself For The Fight By Changing The Rules

Tiger Woods Had No Real Choice But To Miss The Masters

Tiger Woods was doing everything in his power to get his game and body right enough to tee it up in next week's Masters. That opportunity flew out the window the moment he had to crawl out of his own car, literally.  He was charged with two misdemeanors, including DUI with property damage, after turning over his SUV 13 days before opening tee shots would be hit at Augusta National.It seems unbelievable, obvious, and very much ridiculous, to have to say that Woods made the correct choice in announcing he's stepping away from the game and seeking treatment, and therefore skipping out on the Masters. But, when we're discussing an athlete idolized across multiple generations, emphasizing the point feels necessary when some struggle to see this current version of Tiger Woods for what he is: a man and a father who needs help.We're also talking about someone who has the law and future courtroom appearances to keep in mind. Woods was also charged with a DUI in 2017, and potential jail time isn't entirely off the table with his recent charges. Not long after Woods released his first statement since his recent car accident and subsequent DUI charge, Augusta National chairman Fred Ridley shared a statement of his own, offering full support to Tiger while also sharing that the five-time Masters winner wouldn't be attending next week's event."Augusta National Golf Club and the Masters Tournament fully support Tiger Woods as he focuses on his well-being," Ridley's statement began. "Although Tiger will not be joining us in person next week, his presence will be felt here in Augusta."READ: Tiger Woods Arrest Affidavit Reveals Pills, Trouble With Sobriety TestsOn top of the speculation that Woods may try to tee it up in the tournament, he was also set to be in Augusta during tournament week to unveil a newly redesigned course in the area called The Patch. He was also expected to attend the Champions Dinner at Augusta National as well.The golf tournament, a new golf course, and the dinner will go on without him. It's safe to say he'll gain much more during his hiatus from the game and the golf world as a whole while bettering himself.Tiger Woods needs to focus on Tiger Woods, and he seems to be doing just that.

Read moreTiger Woods Had No Real Choice But To Miss The Masters

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Unleashes 18 F-Bombs In Jaw-Dropping Rant

NASCAR legend Dale Earnhardt Jr. may be all grown up now, and the party days might be in the rearview, but don't you think for a second that he's lost his fire. Not one second. Nope. Not even close. The opposite, in fact. Junior certainly sounds more fired up than ever, and that includes his racing days. Dale owns one of the most popular podcasts in America. The Dale Jr. Download is always at the top of the list when it comes to the most streamed/downloaded podcasts, and his media empire – Dirty Mo Media – also produces some incredible NASCAR content. In 2026, folks still listen to Dale Earnhardt Jr. They still idolize him. NASCAR fans can't quit Dale Jr., and I don't blame them. He's Junior, after all. Junior! Anyway, I say all that to say this … did YOU know Dale had a mouth like this? I knew the dude cussed, but this is next-level. If you're at work … headphones IN!Eighteen, for those who lost track. Eighteen. 18!!! It's just so impressive. A little over the top, too, but also … impressive. Sure, some folks will be pissed about this, and I get it. Dale Earnhardt Jr. is supposed to be a role model and kids look up to him and sweet old grandmas listen to his podcast … blah, blah, blah. I get it. See? Foul-mouthed. Disappointing. Lost a fan. Sad. But, to me, this is just the racer coming out of Dale for the first time in a while. You can tell he's been trapped inside a retired guy's body for a while now, and he's finally FREE. This is Junior talking about something he's, clearly, passionate about. Nobody HATED the type of cars they used to run in NASCAR more than Dale Earnhardt Jr. Nobody. He constantly craps on the Car of Tomorrow. Not saying he's crapping on this particular steel-bodied car, but he's also not fully endorsing it. Dale, like his daddy, wanted to be able to BEAT the hell out of someone, clearly, and Martinsvlle was probably the only track where it was possible. So hell yeah, he's gonna drop some F-bombs and sound like a drunken sailor when he's reminiscing about the old Martinsville days. This is all he has now. Just memories. He's retired. He races a Busch Series race once every few years. He's in full dad mode 24/7/365. This is his outlet. His escape. His portal back to the good old days. Eighteen F-bombs in 90 seconds. Impressive for a 51-year-old. He's still got it. 

Read moreDale Earnhardt Jr. Unleashes 18 F-Bombs In Jaw-Dropping Rant

MLB's Worst Umpire Made A Call So Egregiously Bad That Both Teams Laughed At Him

Nobody has had a more miserable start to the MLB season than umpire CB Bucknor. Nobody. Frankly, it's not close. Bucknor has always been a pretty awful umpire. We knew this before ABS. And then, ABS confirmed it last weekend when he forced the Reds and Red Sox to get in a "challenge-off" because his strike zone was so putrid. At one point, Reds player Eugenio Suarez won two challenges … on back-to-back pitches! It was pathetic. Bucknor, of course, was dragged through the mud for his awful performance – which also included a late ejection of Red Sox manager Alex Cora. For those who thought ABS would eliminate manager ejections … think again! Not even close. Not with CB Bucknor behind the dish. Anyway, CB was up to his old tricks again Tuesday night in Milwaukee, when he made – and I'm not kidding – maybe the worst call in the history of baseball. I'm serious. It was so bad, and got overturned so quickly, that players and coaches were seen LAUGHING at this dude from the dugout. Embarrassing:I mean, credit to CB Bucknor for having the nuts to make that call. We all thought we'd seen the last of a dying breed when Angel Hernandez "retired," but buddy, we had no IDEA that CB Bucknor was waiting in the wings. How do you miss that? Seriously, how do you miss him stepping on first base? Well, for starters, you don't even look at the bag. That's a great place to start! WHY did CB Bucknor take his eyes off the bag? That's literally his job. His one and only job in that situation is to look at the bag and see A) if he touches it, B) when he touches it, and C) who gets there first. Instead, CB just randomly follows the poorly thrown ball, and then calls him OUT based on … nothing. Just literally guessed, and, frankly, chose the worst possible door. I'm not sure I've ever seen a player miss first base. I played baseball for 20 years. I've watched it for 30. I can't recall a time when a runner missed first base. Second base? Sure. Third base? Once in a while. But FIRST base? Nope. Players usually get that one every time. But CB Bucknor, without looking, just assumes Jake Bauers missed the bag? Does he know replay exists? Did he not think someone would notice? This guy is just horrible. What a legendary run. I've never seen a call so bad that both teams just openly mock it. Amazing. 

Read moreMLB's Worst Umpire Made A Call So Egregiously Bad That Both Teams Laughed At Him