NASCAR

Always a tough ask when you put NASCAR up against The Masters, but at least they tried, right? I mean, it's Bristol, baby! If any track is gonna give Augusta a run for its money, it's Bristol, right?Right?!Yikes. Not a great race. Not a great crowd, as you'll see. This Next Gen car has just completely ruined short tracks, hasn't it? I know I've said it a dozen times now, but every time we go back — especially to a place as sacred as Bristol — we're reminded that the track just doesn't have its fastball anymore. But look … Ty Gibbs won! That's something, right? At least it wasn't the usual suspects. Joe's grandson — under a ton of heat his first few seasons — finally broke through, so that's a cool deal. Other than that? Eh. Just not a ton going on. That's never stopped us before, though!We'll get to Ty. We'll also get to Kyle Busch showing the youngins what payback looks like at Bristol. I've also got cars BURSTING into flames, Dale Earnhardt Jr. pulling a pretty controversial act with a beer, the most insane crash you'll ever see, and the NASCAR WAGs doing palates before racing 500 miles. See? You ain't getting content like that out of the AP this morning. I promise! And thank God for that, too. Four tires, enough fuel to get us to the Strait of Hormuz and back (whatever that means) and a Budweiser for Dale Jr., of course … Monday Morning Pit-Stop — the ‘This Place Used To Be PACKED’ edition — is LIVE!Congrats to Ty Gibbs. Seriously. I could joke about the nepotism stuff, and perhaps there's some merit to that, but I won't. Frankly, I don't have it in me today. I had a tough weekend. Watching four straight days of golf isn't for the weak, you know. Anyway, Gibbs is only 23, but the clock was ticking — louder and louder — for him to win a Cup race. He's been a full-time Cup driver for 3+ seasons now. Think about that. This is Ty's FOURTH season, and he still hadn't won a race. And he's in a Gibbs car! Duh. It's in his name. But, he's still in one, and couldn't finish the job? Not great. For those who forgot, Gibbs won a Busch (O'Reilly) Series title back in 2022. That night, his dad, Coy, died in his sleep. I mean, goodness gracious. I still remember seeing that news, mere hours before the Cup finale at Phoenix, and being stunned. Coy was Joe Gibbs' son, and also a co-owner and executive at JGR. See? Cool moment. Cool win. Ty Gibbs ain't the most popular driver in the world, but I imagine this will help. Again, at least it's someone new. I don't think I could take another Tyler Reddick win. Now, would it have mattered? I don't know. I've seen some pictures of Bristol circulating the internet this morning, and I gotta be honest … I'm rattled:Yikes. It wasn't great. It didn't look great. I'm also not quite sure why the race was on FS1, but, clearly, I'm not in a position to ask those questions. Anyway, should Bristol lose a race? I don't know. Probably not. It is Bristol, after all. The spring race has never looked like the fall race. And, frankly, the fall race has never looked like the August race. If I were in charge, I'd drop the spring race and move the other one back to August. I'd also bring back Terry Labonte, Dale Earnhardt, Jeff Gordon and Rusty Wallace, but I'm also an out-of-the-box thinker, so I realize the stiffs who run NASCAR may not be ready for that just yet. And for those of you saying I'm cherry-picking photos of Bristol to make it look empty, here's Kyle Busch getting dumped by Riley Herbst – with half-empty seats in the background!Just another miserable day at the office for Kyle Busch, who now hasn't won a Cup race since the early days of the Autopen administration. Sad. I do love that clip of Herbst where his spotter basically tells him to wreck Kyle, and Riley, without literally skipping a beat, does it. Just flat out dumps him. What balls. But then again, Kyle gets to go home to Sam Busch, so I assume he's just fine getting to leave the track a few minutes early:YES! Welcome back to Cabo, Sam Busch! Looks like you had a great week of R&R. One of the very few off weeks for NASCAR drivers during the season, and you guys nailed it. I understand being miserable during a … 1,044 day windless streak … but still, Kyle, it could be worse!Yes, you read that right. One thousand, forty-four. Goodness gracious. OK, let's hit the gas and get to some quickies on the way out. Speaking of NASCAR WAGs … what a heater we're on right now in that arena:I mean, what an off-week! Hooters Gianna is BACK. It's been a long road back, but our girl seems ready to rock and roll. Can't wait. And how about the WAGs getting together for a little pre-race Pilates at Bristol? You ain't getting that sort of #content in the NFL or MLB. Only in NASCAR. They were on FIRE this week. Speaking of … let's quickly check in on how things went down in the Busch Series Saturday night:Amazing. Reminds me of a few years back when Dale Jr., running his yearly race at Bristol, also caught fire. Something about Bristol and burning down, I reckon. Speaking of Junior … he was BACK behind the wheel this past weekend at Nashville, and sent the internet into a tailspin after the race:Honestly, it's a fair point. Sure, Dale is known as the Budweiser guy, not only in NASCAR, but around the world. He's synonymous with Budweiser, even though he quit driving the No. 8 Bud Chevy back in 2007. Wild. But, everyone just assumes he still pounds Bud Heavys. He's 51, folks. Bud Heavys ain't the easiest beer to just throw back. Lord knows I'd hate it. I'd take Busch Light and Mic Ultra over Bud Heavy any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. And please, don't you dare come at me with the always exhausting, "If you were really a man, you'd be drinking an IPA!"No, I wouldn't. I promise, I wouldn't. OK, that's it for today. Good week. Here's an absolutely insane motorcycle crash from Nashville qualifying over the weekend, which was captured in just the funniest way possible. See ya at Kansas.